The RPG With No Name
by anarchy-munkey
Summary: It has tons of swearing (that's why it's R) It funny, romatic, and to be contuned (It's by me and Sarafu)
1. Default Chapter Title

Notes to Reader: Ok, for the people who don't know, quotes in are thoughts, quotes in * * are actions, and onna means woman in Japanese (though you people already knew that, but I'm just tellin' you, just in case you don't know! ^_^) Also, do not read this if you're…well, too young and aren't allowed to read things with bad language and violence ^_^' (ehehehe…) Also, do not read if you're a Dorothy fan…k, well, READ ON!!!  
  
The RPG With No Name (pretty original title, huh?)  
  
Written by Fuujin and Sarafu  
Edited by Sarafu (just thought I'd say that!)  
  
*Fuujin, Sarafu, Quatre, and Wufei are sitting in room, around a coffee table, talking*  
Fuujin: *laughs*  
Sarafu: You think I'm funny, Fuujin?  
Wufei: That was not funny...  
Fuujin: Well, I thought it was funny…  
Quatre: I thought it was humorous...  
Sarafu: *eyes sparkling* You really think so, Quatty???  
Quatre: Uuuh...yeah, I guess...  
Sarafu: *smiles brightly, teeth shine*  
Wufei: What's wrong with that onna's teeth???  
Sarafu: I got them cleaned nice and good! *smiles wider* My teeth are soooooooo nice!!! Thanks to Quatty, he paid for my dentist appointment!  
Quatre: *scratches head* Hehehe...  
Fuujin: You're lucky, Sarafu. *glares at Wufei* All he does is eat, sleep, and spar…   
Wufei: So???  
Sarafu: Hey, Wu-wu, if you like to spar so much, why doncha fight me???  
Wufei: Don't call me Wu-wu…  
Quatre: I don't think so...I already paid to get your teeth cleaned, I don't wanna pay to get them replaced...  
Wufei: *laughs*  
Fuujin: *trying not to laugh*  
Sarafu: *hands on hips* And what is THAT supposed to mean, Quatre Raberba Winner?!  
Quatre: Uh oh, I'm in trouble now! She used my full name...  
Fuujin: That he doesn't want you to hurt Wufei!  
Wufei: What do you mean hurt me?  
Fuujin: Shut up, Wu-wu!  
Quatre: Uh...yeah, that's what I meant...I don't want you to hurt Wu-wu...I mean...  
Wufei: Quatre, shut up before....  
Sarafu: *steps up to Wufei* Before you what???  
Fuujin: *slaps him upside the head* Watch your mouth!  
Sarafu: *throws arms around Quatre*  
Wufei: *shakes head*  
Sarafu: You're not coming close to my wittle Quatty-watty!  
Quatre: *blushes* Why me...what a ridiculous nickname...  
Fuujin: *trying not to laugh*  
Wufei: *laughs*  
Fuujin: Look who's talking, Wu-wu…  
Sarafu: What was that, my little desert prince??? *leans closer*  
Quatre: Um...*leans back*  
Duo: *runs in, pulls them apart* Ok, you two, knock it off...party's over, guys...  
Fuujin: Hey, Duo!  
Sarafu: Duo! You ruined my moment with Quatre...*fist clenched* Omae o korosu...  
Fuujin: Want to borrow the mallet?  
Sarafu: Oh, yes please...*grabs mallet*  
Fuujin: *sits back and watches*  
Quatre: *grabs mallet out of her hands* Sarafu, act your age, not your shoe size...  
Sarafu: But Quaaaaaaaatreeeeeeeee.....  
Quatre: Don't you 'But Quatre' me, young lady! No more mallets or frying pans for you!  
Sarafu: *pouts* Oh pooh...  
Duo: *gets out of hiding* Thanks, Quatre, buddy! I thought Sarafu was gonna go Heero on me...  
Fuujin: But that's no fun! *takes the mallet from Quatre* Give me that!  
Quatre: Ok, ok, sheesh...  
Fuujin: Duo, honey, come here…  
Duo: N-no way, babe! I'm outta here! *runs away*  
Wufei: Scared of an onna?  
Duo: Hell yeah! Especially one who's armed!  
Fuujin: *turns to Wufei* You want to be beaten with the mallet?  
Wufei: *shakes head* No…  
Fuujin: *puts the mallet down* There!  
Sarafu: Quatre, I'm gonna go in the kitchen and make you some tea...  
Quatre: No, thank you...Who knows WHAT you'll put in it...  
Wufei: Onna, make me a cake.  
Fuujin: Bake your own damn cake!  
Trowa: *walks in*   
Fuujin: *looks at Trowa* Hey, Trowa!  
Quatre: Trowa? How'd you get in here???  
Trowa:...I just flipped over the gate...  
Duo: What'd you do that for??? The gate was open.  
Fuujin: *looks at them*  
Wufei: ...  
Trowa: *raises eyebrow* It was??? *looks out window* Oh, damn...hurt my back for nothing...  
Fuujin: Trowa, are you feeling okay?  
Trowa: Yeah, I'm fine...  
Quatre: Now, watch your language, Trowa...  
Fuujin: Why?  
Trowa: I feel so dizzy...just what did Cathy put in my Java, anyway???  
Quatre: This is my house, please no profane language...  
Wufei: Leave him be, onna.  
Fuujin: You're no fun…  
Duo: This is your house, Quatre!? Damn, you sure got a hell of a place!  
Trowa: Yeah, pretty damn nice...  
Fuujin: *laughs*  
Sarafu: And it's pretty damn roomy, too!  
Quatre: *growls*  
Sarafu: So, shall I get us all some damn tea???  
Quatre: *head bowed in anger*  
Fuujin: Sure why the hell not?  
Quatre: *sweating*  
Sarafu: Should I, dammit???  
Wufei: *grins evilly* Yes, dammit!  
Duo: Damn, now it's my turn to say damn...  
Sarafu: Damndamndamndamn...  
Fuujin & Wufei: *try not to laugh*  
Fuujin: Were the hell is Heero? He's got to come see this bitchin' place!!!  
Quatre: *gets up, knocking chair over* DID ANY OF YOU HEAR A FUCKING WORD I SAID?! GODDAMMIT! SARAFU, GET IN THAT FUCKING KITCHEN, AND MAKE SOME FUCKING TEA, NOW! THE REST OF YOU, JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! *sits down in chair, arms folded over chest*  
Everyone: *in shock*  
Sarafu: *obeys and goes into kitchen*  
Fuujin & Wufei: *obey*  
Heero: Hey, guys. Did I miss anything???  
Quatre: Fuck you...  
Heero: Ooookay then...  
Fuujin: *trying not to laugh*   
Wufei: *covers Fuujin's mouth*  
Heero: *sits down, leans over to Duo* What's wrong with Quatre???  
Duo: *whispers* He's just a little excited right now...  
Sarafu: Ok, now, who wants some tea???  
Heero: Tell me what you put in it, and I'll think about it...  
Sarafu: Oh, hahaha. Very funny, Heero...  
Fuujin: I'll take some.  
Duo: *raises hand* I want some!!!  
Wufei: Onna, give me a cup…  
Sarafu: Say please??? *hands cup to Duo and Fuujin*  
Wufei: Now, onna.  
Sarafu: Say pwetty pweeze???  
Wufei: No.  
Sarafu: Then you don't get any...not until you say the magic word!  
Wufei: *mumbles* Please…  
Sarafu: *hand to ear* What's that??? Did you say something???  
Wufei: *mumbles it again*  
Sarafu: Could you say that again, I didn't quite hear you...  
Wufei: *in a low voice* Please.  
Fuujin: *trying not to smile*  
Sarafu: Now say pretty please...  
Wufei: *mumbles* Pretty please…  
Sarafu: Say pretty please with a cherry on top...  
Wufei: Dammit, onna! Give me the fucking tea!  
Sarafu: *smiles* Ok, close enough! *hands him cup*  
Quatre: *pouting*   
Sarafu: Quatre, honey, would you like a cup? I made your favorite...  
Quatre: *in a low voice* No, thank you...  
Sarafu: *frowns* Well, if you don't want it...I'll just make you a cup and put it on the table for you just in case, ok???  
Quatre: *still pouting*  
Fuujin: *whispers to Wufei* Tell Quatre you're sorry…  
Wufei: Onna, your crazy!  
Duo: Come on, Quatre, man! We're sorry...*glares at Wufei* Aren't we, Wufei???   
Everyone: *glares at Wufei*  
Fuujin: Yes, and I have a mallet. You put two and two together…  
Wufei: I'm...sor...ry  
Fuujin: *jaw drops*  
Quatre: *looks at Wufei* Well, since even Wufei apologized...I forgive you all...  
Everyone: *sighs*  
Wufei: *sweatdrop*  
Fuujin: *smiles* You did good, honey!  
Quatre: *takes cup in hand, takes a sip*  
Sarafu: *smiles*  
Quatre: Hey, this is pretty damn good!  
Sarafu: *giggles*  
Fuujin & Wufei: *sweatdrop*  
Quatre: *smiles*  
Heero & Trowa: ...  
Wufei: I'm going to kill him…   
Fuujin: Settle down, honey…  
Wufei: Did you just hear him!?   
Fuujin: Yes, now sit down…  
Duo: Yeah, settle down, Wu-wu...  
Wufei: DON'T CALL ME WU-WU!!!  
Quatre: I'm just trying to be funny, Wufei...  
Duo: *smiles at Wufei*   
Fuujin: *trying not to laugh*  
Duo: *gives Wufei a peace sign*  
Wufei: *flicks Duo off*  
Duo: Well, that was uncalled for...  
Sarafu: Oh, my...*covers Quatre's eyes*  
Heero: *covers Sarafu's eyes*  
Wufei: *puts finger down* And my name is WuFEI!!!  
Sarafu: So, Fuujin, I'm just asking, but…*smiles* You're obsessed with Wufei, aren't you???   
Fuujin: Just a lil…  
Sarafu: Oh???  
Fuujin: *hides my shrine to him, Quatre, and Trowa*  
Wufei: Onna?  
Fuujin: What?  
Wufei: What are you hiding?  
Quatre: Yeah, what are you hiding???  
Trowa: ...yeah...  
Fuujin: NOTHING!!! Nothing at all… *face turns red*  
Wufei: Onna, what is it?   
Fuujin: Ummmmm...nothing…  
Duo: *sighs* How come I'm the one who has no fans in this room???  
Sarafu: That's not true! I'm a fan, Duo!   
Fuujin: *hugs Duo*  
Duo: Really? Do you have a shrine dedicated to me!? *smiles* SCORE!!!  
Sarafu: Well, um...no, actually...  
Duo: *falls out of chair*  
Fuujin: I do! I just left your shrine in my room…*covers mouth*  
Duo: *looks at Fuujin, smiles*  
Wufei: Shrine?  
Fuujin: *blushes like mad*  
Sarafu: *smiles* I have a shrine!!!  
Duo: Gee, I wonder WHO it's dedicated to...  
Quatre: *blushes*  
Fuujin: *hides shrines to the GW guys, looks at Quatre* Me, too!  
Sarafu: *throws arms around Quatre's neck*  
Quatre: *sighs, bows head*  
Wufei: Onna. What shrine?  
Fuujin: ...  
Dorothy: *walks in* Hey, Quatre! What's up???  
Sarafu: *glares at Dorothy, thinks of evil things to do*  
Quatre: *sighs, pops bubble*  
Sarafu: *jumps, smiles*  
Fuujin: *beats Dorothy with the mallet* I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! HATE! HATE!! HATE!!! *stops* Sorry about that…  
Dorothy: *beaten and bruised* N...o....prob...l...em...  
Sarafu: Excuse me, peoples, I'll be right back...  
Quatre: *raises eyebrow* Huh? Sarafu???  
Sarafu: I'll be RIGHT back! *disappears up stairs*  
Dorothy: *sits down next to Quatre* So, Quatre, how's life lately???  
Quatre: Um...well...actually...  
Dorothy: Well, that's good! Relena and I just went shopping, and I got this new dress! *shows off dress* What do you think of it???  
Sarafu: *hearing what she said, thinks* Hmph! It'd look better on a man than you...  
Quatre: It looks...nice, I guess...  
Duo: Hell yeah! *drools*  
Fuujin: *hits her with the mallet again*  
Wufei: *begins to puke*  
Fuujin: I don't think Wu-wu likes it…  
Heero: *raises eyebrow* How can Duo drool over such a disgusting display?  
Trowa: I was just thinking the same...  
Heero: *turns to Trowa* Whoa! You can read my thoughts???  
Trowa: Yes, I have been able to do so ever since I was a child...  
Heero: Oh, this is great...does that mean that you heard me when I was thinking about...???   
Trowa: Oh, yes, every word...  
Fuujin: *looks at Trowa & Heero* What are you two doing?  
Trowa: *uses telepathy* I'm reading Heero's mind.   
Fuujin: *hits Dorothy over and over* Cool!  
Trowa: And I can read yours, too.…tsk tsk...naughty thoughts, naughty thoughts...  
Fuujin: Hey, get outta my head!  
Wufei: *looks at Fuujin & Trowa* What's onna thinking?  
Fuujin: Trowa, I'll beat you with this mallet  
Heero: *pushes Trowa over* I don't think you wanna know...  
Fuujin: *sighs* He's so cute…  
Dorothy: So, Quatre, I wanna tell ya something that I've been wanting to tell you all this time...*leans in closer, whispers something in Quatre's ear*  
Quatre: *slowly, face begins to glow "very" red*  
Fuujin: SARAFU, the BAKA is FLIRTING WITH YOUR MAN!!!  
Sarafu: *comes down, now looking like an army soldier at war (with the black warpaint and everything)* DIE, YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!  
Sarafu: *starts to fire at Dorothy, pumps her full of lead*  
Fuujin: *smiles and watches* I got dibs on Sarafu!  
Wufei: Same here!  
Duo: *raises money in the air* Me too!  
Fuujin: *looks at Trowa* Why are all the good looking guys crazy?  
Trowa: What was that???  
Fuujin:God, don't you dare me messin' around with my head!  
Trowa: I heard that, you little shit...  
Fuujin: I love you, too, Trowa.  
Trowa: *blushes*   
Heero: Trowa, why are you blushing???  
Fuujin: *smiles*  
Trowa: *walks away* If you'll excuse me, I have to go use the little boy's room...  
Quatre: Just don't throw up on the rug, it came straight from Persia! Cost me a LOT!!!  
Trowa: *waves* Got it...  
Fuujin: *giggles*  
Wufei: Onna, what do you have to do with this?  
Fuujin: Me? Oooh, nothing…  
Sarafu: *stands ontop of Dorothy's mutilated body* Victory is mine!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!  
Everyone: *claps*  
Sarafu: *dragging Dorothy's body, makes it to bathroom before Trowa* Now you're gonna pay…  
Quatre: What's Sarafu gonna do in the bathroom with Dorothy, anyway???  
Sarafu: *sticks Dorothy's head in toilet, flushes* Dorothy go down the hooooole...  
Dorothy: *spinning around in toilet*  
Fuujin: *laughing*  
Trowa: *runs in and throws up on Dorothy's head as it spins around*  
Sarafu: *pats Trowa's back* That's right, Trowa, let it aaaall out!   
Fuujin: Hey, Sarafu, can we kill your bro?  
Sutaro: WHAT?!  
Sarafu: Good idea! *runs after Sutaro with gun*  
Fuujin: *grins evilly and takes Wufei's sword*  
Wufei: Onna, that's mine!  
Sutaro: *running around house* HAPPY THOUGHTS! HAPPY THOUGHTS! HAPPY THOUGHTS!...  
Fuujin: *slashes and stabs Sutaro over and over* Happy happy, joy joy…  
Sarafu: *joins in, firing at Sutaro* Happy happy, joy joy…  
Sutaro: Oh! Ouch! OOH! AHH! Hey! Not that! OOCH! OWIE!!!  
Wufei: Note to self: Do NOT piss onna off.  
Sarafu: *pumps rest of round into Sutaro's body, runs out of ammo* Dammit!!!  
Quatre: *glares* Sarafu...what did I tell you...  
Fuujin: *hands her the mallet*  
Sarafu: Heehee...*takes mallet*  
Fuujin: Hummmmmmm... *stabs him again and again* Hey, Duo!  
Duo: What?  
Fuujin: *loud enough for Trowa to hear* Is Trowa gay?  
Sarafu: *whacks Sutaro over and over* Whistle while you work! *whistles* And merrily, together, we can smash him to a pulp! So hum a merry tune! hmmmmmmmm....  
Fuujin: Or does he like Dorothy?  
Trowa: *wipes mouth* You're a very bad girl...  
Fuujin: You don't know the half of it! Weeell, TROWA???   
Trowa: ...  
Sutaro: *now smashed to a pulp*  
Fuujin: *cuts his head off*  
Trowa: *continues throwing up on Dorothy, who is now halfway down the hole*  
Sarafu: *wipes hands on pants* Well, I think that about does it! *brings mallet down really hard, pieces of Sutaro fly all over walls* THERE!  
Heero: Mission accomplished...  
Sarafu: You said it, Heero...  
Wufei: Quatre, you and Trowa spend a LOT of time together…  
Fuujin: *laughs*  
Sarafu: *looks at Fuujin* What's THAT supposed to mean???  
Fuujin: You don't want to know…  
Quatre: *falls out of chair* I think I'm gonna be sick...  
Trowa: *throws up even more*   
Dorothy: *feet spinning around and around*  
Wufei: *laughs*  
Fuujin: *smacks Wufei with the arm she picked up off the floor*  
Wufei: OUCH!  
Fuujin: *drops the arm*  
Sarafu: Injustice, Wu-wu???  
Wufei: YES INJUSTICE! DON'T CALL ME WU-WU!  
Sarafu: *smiles*  
Fuujin: *sits* Now what do we do? *looks around* Quatre, your house is a mess…  
Quatre: *on hands and knees, scrubbing blood and guts off of floor*  
Wufei: *watches him*  
Fuujin: Quatre?  
Quatre: *hard a work*  
Sarafu: Oh, Quatre, sweetie, this is my fault...let me help...*rolls up sleeves* This looks like a job for...*drum roll* SARAFU, THE FANTASIC...CLEAner...wo…man...*sighs*...Well, here I go...  
Wufei: *laughs*   
Fuujin: *worshiping shrines, one to each GW guy*  
Sarafu: *runs around house, cleaning it in seconds*  
Quatre: *surprised and happy*  
Sarafu: *finishes, runs up to Quatre, panting* Well (pant) what do you (pant) think???  
Quatre: ...(speechless)...  
Sarafu: *smiles*   
Quatre: Sarafu...thank you soooooooo much...   
Sarafu: *smiles widely* Anything for my little Quatty!  
Fuujin: *still worshiping them*  
Wufei: Onna, what are you doing?   
Fuujin: N....nothing…  
Trowa: *comes out of bathroom, thinks to Wufei* I know what she's doing...and thinking...  
Wufei: What?  
Trowa: *walks up to Wufei, whispers in ear*  
Fuujin: What are you telling him?  
Duo: *raises eyebrows* Come on, tell us too!  
Wufei: 0_0  
Trowa: Don't act so surprised, she's been thinkin about it a lot...and also…  
Fuujin: DON'T YOU DARE, TROWA BARTON!!!  
Trowa: *folds arms, smiles at Fuujin (a very rare thing)* If you don't want me to, then put on your kneepads and start apologizing...  
Fuujin: *follows his orders*   
Wufei: Onna, stop that!  
Heero: ...I'm not involved...  
*gurgling sound from bathroom*   
Quatre: What's that sound???  
Sarafu: *runs in bathroom* Dammit! Dorothy clogged up the fucking toilet...  
Fuujin & Wufei: *laugh*  
Quatre: SARAFU!!! WHAT DID I TELL YOU!?  
Sarafu: Sorry...*straps on kneepads, apologizes to Quatre*  
Fuujin: Trowa, master, may I stand now?  
Trowa: You may stand...*sits down*  
Fuujin: *gets up, sits next to Wufei*   
Quatre: *drags Sarafu into bathroom, closes door*  
Fuujin: Hmmm, I wonder what they're doing?  
Wufei: I don't want to know…  
Sarafu: *screams from bathroom* No, Quatre! Not that!! Anything but that!!!  
Fuujin: Now neither do I…  
Quatre: Sarafu, sit still...  
*banging and booming from bathroom, something falls and shatters*  
Fuujin: 0_0  
Everyone: *sweatdrop*  
Quatre: *walks out, turns back into bathroom* And don't take it out until I tell you to! *walks over, sits down on couch*  
Trowa & Heero: *raise eyebrows*  
Fuujin: *stares at Quatre* Quatre can be down right evil if he wants to…  
Quatre: That'll teach her...*folds arms*   
Wufei: *looks at Quatre and raises an eyebrow*  
Duo: Yo, Sarafu, you ok???  
Sarafu: SHK PHM PHK UPH!  
Everyone: *raise eyebrows*  
Sarafu: *walks out with a red bar of soap in her mouth*  
Quatre: I TOLD her a MILLION TIMES, NOT to disobey me!  
Fuujin: Why is the soap red? I always thought it was white, blue, or green?  
Quatre: Yes, well this is special soap, made for potty-mouths, like Sarafu!  
Sarafu: *glares at Q* And to think, I worshiped you...  
Trowa: *sighs*  
Fuujin: Fuck this, Sarafu! Take that out of your mouth!  
Quatre: *glares at Fuujin* You wanna end up with a bar in your mouth as well???  
Heero: *tries not to laugh*  
Trowa: *tries not to laugh*  
Fuujin: Dammit, Sarafu, take the soap out!  
Quatre: No, Sarafu! Don't take the soap out!  
Fuujin: Dammit, Quatre, don't FUCKING FIGHT WITH ME!!!   
Quatre: *turns to Wufei* Wufei, a little help, please?!  
Wufei: Onna scary when she's mad…  
Fuujin: Damn right, I am!  
Sarafu: HPH KHPTHSKPH PHSKS SHPHSPSWPSNPSP SHYPHSP!!!   
Trowa: *coughs nervously*   
Fuujin: *looks at Trowa* Are you in my mind again? *takes the soap out of Sarafu's mouth*  
Sarafu: Hey, gimme that back! *sticks soap back in mouth*  
Quatre: That's a good girl, Sarafu!  
Fuujin: *looks confused* What the FUCK!?  
Wufei: *looks at Quatre*  
Sarafu: *sticks other end in Fuujin's mouth* Here, try it, it's pretty good! Cherry flavor!  
Fuujin: *takes the soap out of mouth*  
Sarafu: *cringes*  
Heero: ...I'm not involved...  
Fuujin: Heero, go find Relena!  
Heero: *glares* Must...find...Relena...*walks off*  
Fuujin: Kill her when you do!  
Wufei: *looks at Fuujin* Do you like anybody?  
Fuujin: Yes.  
Heero: Must...find...Relena...omae...o...korosu...  
Wufei: Who?  
Sarafu: *smiles*  
Fuujin: Ummmmm...let me get back to you on that one…  
Sarafu: *frowns, sucks on soap*  
Fuujin: Sarafu is my friend. You guys are…  
Sarafu: *looks at Quatre, takes soap out of mouth* Hey, Quatre, ya got any in apple or grape???  
Quatre: I don't know, go check under the sink.  
Fuujin:* laughs*  
Sarafu: *runs in bathroom*  
*toilet is flushed, everyone turns to bathroom*  
Sarafu: Sorry! Dorothy wasn't down all the way yet!  
Fuujin: *laughs*  
Sarafu: *sticks plunger in toilet, pumps it up and down* Why the fuck did she clog the toilet???  
Quatre: What was that, Sarafu???  
Wufei: *sweatdrop*  
Sarafu: *sighs, sticks new bar of soap in mouth* Phckn sht... *pulls bar of soap out of mouth* Hey, kiwi lime!!! not bad...*sticks it back in mouth*  
Fuujin: *laughs*  
Duo: Oh, sorry! I fell asleep there for a while! Did I miss anything???   
Fuujin: *sweatdrop*  
Trowa: *uses telepathy on Duo* Nothing special...  
Duo: Who's that??? Who's there??? Is that you, Hitler???  
Trowa: *sweatdrop* No...  
Duo: Wait, don't tell me...Sadam???  
Trowa: *sighs, frustrated* No...  
Duo: *leans back* I thought it was you, Treize...  
Trowa: Never mind, go back to sleep...  
Fuujin: What are we going to do now?  
Trowa: *makes spooky sounds in Fuujin's head*  
Fuujin: *shakes head* Get the hell out of my head…  
Sarafu: TOILET'S UNCLOGGED!!!  
Trowa: FINALLY!!! *runs in bathroom, slams door shut*  
Fuujin: *laughs*  
Sarafu: Geez, looks like he had to go...  
Wufei: *yawns*  
Trowa: *is heard whistling in the bathroom*  
Fuujin: I don't want to know…  
Wufei: Onna, none of us do…  
Sarafu: Boy, I'm starving! *runs in kitchen* Let me cook up a little something for all of us!  
Fuujin: Ummmmm okay…  
Quatre: Oh, great, I hope she doesn't get into one of her 'experiments' again...  
Fuujin: You want some help?  
Wufei: No, onna, she doesn't.  
Sarafu: Oh, no! I got it! *drops something, it shatters* Um...Quatre???  
Quatre: What now???  
Sarafu: Ya know that two foot glass elephant ya got sitting in the middle of the kitchen table???  
Quatre: *shocked* You didn't...  
Sarafu: Apparently...I did...  
Quatre: *storms into kitchen*  
Wufei: Onna, you can't cook…  
Fuujin: Yes, I can!  
Wufei: No…  
Fuujin: YES!  
Wufei: NO!  
Fuujin: Let's see YOU cook…  
Wufei: I can't!  
Duo: *waves hand* Whoa, hey, guys, calm down, will ya???  
Fuujin: See?! I can cook! It's YOU who can't!  
Wufei: YOU can't cook, either!  
Heero: *walks in, gun in hands* Mission...accomplished...*sees them fighting, smiles* ...I'm not involved...  
Fuujin: Good boy, Heero. And I CAN COOK!  
Wufei: NO, YOU CAN'T! Onna, you can NOT COOK!  
Fuujin: I CAN!  
Wufei: CAN'T!  
Duo: *trying to break them up* Come on, guys! Break it up!  
Fuujin: Duo, can I cook?  
Duo: *thinks* Well, let's see...last thing I had that you cooked were those pies...*scratches head* or was that Hilde that made those... *looks at ceiling* or was is maybe Sarafu that made the pies, and Fuujin that made those muffins...*smiles* I know! It was Sarafu who made the pies, Hilde made the muffins, and Fuujin made the cake!  
Fuujin: Duo, did you like the cake I gave you?  
Wufei: You made him a cake?  
Duo: Or maybe it was...  
Fuujin: I made the damn cake.  
Quatre: *can be heard in kitchen, scolding Sarafu*  
Duo: Oh yeah, that chocolate one, right???  
Fuujin: Yeah.  
Wufei: Well, can she cook?  
Duo: Yeah, it was pretty good...  
Fuujin: Ha!  
Wufei: Wait a second, she made YOU a cake?  
Duo: Well, um...  
Fuujin: Yes, I made him a cake.  
Wufei: But…  
Fuujin: But you never showed up for dinner!  
Wufei: *looks at the ground*  
Fuujin: Heero, did you like the pies I made?  
Heero: ...I'm not involved...  
Fuujin: Too late.  
Heero: *grumbles, walks away* Whatever...  
Wufei: PIES?! *stops Heero*  
Heero: *stops*  
Wufei: Well, can onna cook?  
Heero: ...hmmm...*glares*   
W: -_-'  
Sarafu: *walks out with sandwiches on a platter*  
Quatre: *can be heard in kitchen, sweeping up broken glass*  
Sarafu: *sits down, face red*  
Fuujin: *walks into the kitchen*   
Wufei: *looks at Sarafu*  
Trowa: *after about a half an hour, comes out, whistling "Rhythm Emotion"*  
Sarafu: *smiles, then frowns*  
Wufei: *raises a brow*  
Sarafu: Um...sandwich, Wufei???   
Wufei: Sure…  
Heero: I'm not involved...  
Wufei: SHUT UP, HEERO!  
Sarafu: *sniff*  
Wufei: Onna, you okay?  
Sarafu: *smiles, eyes watering* I'll be fine, Wufei...thanks for asking...  
Wufei: *looks at her* Crying?  
Sarafu: *looks at Wufei* Wufei, do you think Quatre loves me???  
Wufei: *looks surprised* …Yeah…  
Sarafu: *smiles* Thank you, Wufei, you're such a good friend…  
Wufei: *smiles slightly*  
Sarafu: *grabs sandwich, starts to eat it*  
Wufei: *takes one and eats*  
Sarafu: *eats another sandwich*  
Wufei: *watches*  
Sarafu: *smiles at Wufei*  
Wufei: *smiles*  
Sarafu: Why's he just sitting there?  
Wufei: *looks at the ground*  
  
***And now for the soap opera part of the RPG…I don't know how it turned into a soap opera…don't read on if you don't like mushy stuff…^_^***  
  
Fuujin: Quatre, why was her face red?  
Quatre: *sweep, sweep, sweep*  
Fuujin: Quatre?  
Quatre: WHAT?!  
Fuujin: *stumbles backwards, tripping over self*  
Quatre: *continues to sweep*  
Fuujin: *picks up the larger pieces* Why was Sarafu's face red?  
Quatre: Don't ask me...  
Fuujin: Well, yelling and crashing means something!  
Quatre: I didn't do anything, ok?!  
Fuujin: *slaps him* Put your damn head on straight, man!  
Quatre: *rubs face* What the hell was that for?!  
Fuujin: Can't you see that she likes you? Or are you too damn blind?  
Quatre: I know she likes me, it's just that I'm sick of it!  
Fuujin: Why? She does everything you want!  
Quatre: Do you know how much this damn elephant cost me, HUH!?  
Heero: *walks in* I'm not involved...  
Quatre: SHUT THE HELL UP, HEERO!!!  
Heero: *walks away*  
Fuujin: FUCK THE ELEPHANT!! I'LL GET YOU ANOTHER FUCKING ELEPHANT!!!  
Quatre: Yeah, like YOU have the money...  
Fuujin: Who says I need money? I can get the money!  
Quatre: How?! Steal it?!  
Fuujin: No.. well, maybe…  
Quatre: Dammit! I don't want another elephant that's paid for with other people's money!   
Fuujin: Why do you care?! You get your fucking elephant!!!  
Quatre: *sighs*...You know what, forget it...*throws pieces in trash, walks to door*   
Fuujin: No, I'm not going to! *runs over to the door*  
Quatre: *grabs coat* Just leave me alone...I'm going out...  
Fuujin: No!  
Quatre: Get out of my way! I can't STAND this place anymore!  
Fuujin: Then make us leave! Don't you dare walk out on her!  
Quatre: ...  
***  
Sarafu: *eats sandwich after sandwich after sandwich*  
Wufei: Onna, stop eating.  
Sarafu: *takes a drink of champagne* (where'd the champagne come from? I don't know...)…HIC!…  
***  
Fuujin: Do whatever you want to me, but don't you DARE hurt my friends!  
Quatre: Well, then why don't you go and comfort her? She probably needs you right now more than me...  
Fuujin: Why don't you go apologize?  
Quatre: She's the one who should be doing the apologizing!  
Fuujin: Why?! She did! *glares at him* Your a fucking asshole. *walks away*  
Quatre: ...*sighs, walks out of door*...  
***  
Fuujin: Sarafu, you okay?   
Sarafu: *drinks another glass of champagne like it's juice*…HIC!… I...was jusht...having a...drink...wiff...*hic*...Wufei...  
Fuujin: Drunk… *sighs, turns to Duo* Duo, go talk some sense into Quatre, before I beat it into him…  
Duo: *fast asleep*  
Fuujin: Oookay, then…nevermind…  
Wufei: *stands and goes to find Quatre* I'll do it…  
***  
Quatre: *walking with hands in pockets* Dammit! Fuujin was right...I am an asshole... shit...  
Wufei: *finds him*  
Quatre: Wufei? What are you doing here???  
Wufei: *looks at Quatre* Well, Ang was going to beat some sense into you if you don't go talk to Sarafu.  
Quatre: *turns away from Wufei* I can't...not after what I said to her...  
Wufei: What'd you say?  
Quatre: I said some...pretty harsh things...  
Wufei: Like…??? Tell me, I know more about onnas than you think.  
Quatre: Well, the elephant, for one, how clumsy she was, how she always butts into my personal life... she'd never forgive me...  
Wufei: She might. Get home.  
Quatre: She drives me crazy, but...*sighs*...I love her so much...  
Wufei: Then get home.   
Quatre: *looks over at Wufei* But...she'll never want to see me again...I...just...can't...*runs off*  
Wufei: *follows Quatre*  
Trowa: *uses his telepathy* Wufei, come home. Leave him...  
Wufei: Why?  
Trowa: Trust me, this is something Sarafu and Quatre have to get through together...by themselves...they don't need your help...  
Wufei: How, when they're not together? I know, if it was....  
Trowa: Just trust me...they'll get through...  
Wufei: *heads back to the house*  
***  
Fuujin: Sarafu, I'm sure Quatre and Wufei will be back soon…  
Sarafu: Quatre...please come home...  
Fuujin: He will  
Sarafu: *looks at Fuujin* Ya really think so?  
Fuujin: I know so. They always come back…  
Sarafu: *laying on couch* ...Quatre...  
Fuujin: It's okay. He'll be back any second now…  
  
To Be Continued…^_^  
  
Author's Note: No, Sarafu and I do not own any of the GW characters. I own Fuujin, and Sarafu owns Sarafu (no duh!). Remember, this was made to make people laugh. If you are offended by any of this material, send your flames to chocoboviii@aol.com ! If you have any compliments, send them to chocoboviii@aol.com or fuujin_15@yahoo.com ! ^_^ Stay sweet, peoples! 


	2. Default Chapter Title

Notes to Reader: Ok, for the people who don't know, quotes in are thoughts, quotes in * * are actions, onna means woman and baka means idiot in Japanese (though you people already knew that, but I'm just tellin' you, just in case you don't know! ^_^) Also, do not read this if you're…well, too young and aren't allowed to read things with bad language and violence ^_^' Also contains some sexual content (hehehe…) Also, do not read if you're a Dorothy fan…k, well, READ ON!!!  
  
The RPG With No Name Part 2 (and you thought it was finished! :P)  
  
Written by Fuujin and Sarafu  
Edited by Sarafu (just thought I'd say that!)  
  
Wufei: *standing outside of the house*  
Trowa: *bowing his head, trying to avoid the others*  
Sarafu: *asleep on the couch*  
Fuujin: Trowa, where's Wufei and Quatre?  
Trowa: Wufei will be home any second now...  
Fuujin: *sighs* You hungry?  
Trowa: *looks at her* Who, me???  
Fuujin: No, the muffin man. Yes, you!  
Trowa: *shrugs* No, not really...  
Sarafu: *in sleep*...Quatre...  
Fuujin: *looks at Sarafu*  
Sarafu: *stirs on the couch* ...come home...  
Fuujin: *covers Sarafu up then walks into the kitchen*  
Trowa: *sits next to Sarafu, looks at her* Don't need to be telepathic to know what she's thinkin about...  
Sarafu: *whimpers*  
Wufei: *walks in*  
Trowa: About time, Wu-wu...  
Wufei: *looks at Trowa*  
Trowa: *smiles, giving him a peace sign*  
Fuujin: *runs into the living room* Where's Quatre?  
Wufei: Beats me…  
Sarafu: *stirs* ...Qua...tre...Quatre...QUATRE??? *sits up, looks around* Quatre? Are you here??? *tries to get up, stumbles and falls, putting a hand to hear head, moans* What a hangover...  
Fuujin: *sighs* Am I the only living being that doesn't get hangovers?  
Trowa: *makes funny noises in Fuujin's head*  
Trowa: Hangover...hangover...hangover...  
Trowa: Ooooooooooo...  
Fuujin: Trowa, get the hell out of my head!  
Trowa: *stops*  
Fuujin: Thank you.  
Duo: *stops snoring, sits up* Sorry! I fell asleep again...did I miss anything???  
Fuujin: No.  
Fuujin: He's on his way home.  
Sarafu: *looks up at Fuujin* But...you said that he's come home with Wufei??? *stands up* I have to go find him...I have to apologize...I've made his life miserable...  
Wufei: Lay down, onna.  
Fuujin: Yes, Sarafu, lay down, he'll be back soon.  
Sarafu: *walks over to Wufei, grabs coat on hook next to him on wall* No, I have to find him!  
Wufei: *picks her up and puts her back on the couch*  
Sarafu: No...no, I have to...*groans, puts a hand to her head*  
Wufei: Stay.  
Sarafu: No...*tries to get up, but is too weak* I had WAY too much champagne...  
Wufei: Stay.   
Sarafu: I'm not a dog, Wufei! *sits back*  
Fuujin: Go put some dry clothes on, Wufei, and leave her alone.  
Wufei: *hugs Fuujin and goes to change*  
Sarafu: *smiles, leans back on couch, frowns* Quatre... *looks out window* He's out there...in the rain...all alone...We can't just leave him there!  
Fuujin: Sarafu lay down, please…  
Sarafu: NO! I have to find him! Please, Fuujin...let me look for him...  
Fuujin: *sighs* Ok, but let me come with you. You'll be lucky to walk.  
Sarafu: No, that's ok...I'll live...*gets up, slips on coat* Quatre gave me this coat for Christmas... *sighs*  
Trowa: Really??? How come I didn't get a coat??? *frowns*  
Sarafu: Shut up, Trowa...  
Trowa: …  
Fuujin: Be careful.  
Sarafu: *gives her a peace sign, walks out door*  
Duo: *snoring on couch*  
Heero: I'm not involved...  
Fuujin: *sighs and sits down, taking a small thing of whisky out of her pocket, and the bottle shakes as she drinks some*  
Trowa: *looks at her* You drink???  
Fuujin: ...yeah…   
Trowa: *raises eyebrow* Aren't you a little to YOUNG to be drinking, Fuuj???  
Fuujin: Do I care?  
Heero: I'm not involved...*walks off*  
Trowa: ...  
Fuujin: What? *puts the bottle back in her pocket*  
Trowa: Nothing...  
Duo: *snooooooooore*  
Trowa: *covers Duo's face with a pillow*  
Duo: *muffled snooooooooooore*  
Fuujin: You'll suffocate him like that! Plug his nose.  
Trowa: *smiles, pushes down on pillow*  
Duo: *very muffled snoooooooooooore*  
Fuujin: *smiles*  
Wufei: *walks down stairs*  
Trowa: Welcome back...  
Wufei: …  
Fuujin: Don't kill Duo!  
Trowa: *pushes harder* But he won't shut up!  
Duo: *very very muffled snoooooooooooooooore*  
Trowa: *sweatdrop*  
Fuujin: *walks over and takes the pillow off of Duo* Get me some duct tape or something…  
Trowa: *pulls out a roll of duct tape from behind his back*  
Wufei: What? What for?  
Fuujin: *takes the tape and makes it so Duo can't breath out of his nose*  
Trowa: *stifles a laugh* MWAHAHA!!!  
Fuujin: *smiles*  
Heero: ...*walks off*  
Fuujin & Wufei: -_-'  
~~~  
Quatre: *walking down street, head bowed, his hair is soaking wet*  
~~~  
Sarafu: *runs down street, her hood pulled over her head, looks around* Where are you??? *continues running*  
~~~  
Trowa: *looks at his watch* I hope Sarafu found Quatre...  
Wufei: Read her mind.  
Trowa: Oh yeah!  
Fuujin & Wufei: -_-'  
~~~  
Sarafu: *running down street, splashing in puddles as she went*  
Trowa: Sarafu...did ya find Quatre yet???  
Sarafu: *still running, stops, looks around, continues*  
~~~  
Fuujin: Well?  
Trowa: ...She's trying to block me off...  
~~~  
Trowa: Hey, Sarafu!  
Sarafu: *can't hear him, her mind's set on Quatre*  
~~~  
Trowa: -_-' Can't get a hold of her...  
Fuujin: Leave her be.  
Trowa: *looks at Fuujin* You think they'll make it out ok???  
Fuujin: How the hell should I know? I just trust them, okay?  
Wufei: Onna?  
Trowa: ...  
Fuujin: I'm sorry. *walks into the kitchen*  
Wufei: *follows her* Onna, what's wrong?  
Duo: *snoring nasally*  
Trowa: *eyes closed, arms folded across his chest, head bowed*  
~~~  
Sarafu: *still running, looks around, sees the rain is getting worse by the minute*  
Quatre: *walking down street, stops, sighs*  
Sarafu: Please Quatre...stop running from me so I can apologize...  
Quatre: *looks around*  
Sarafu: *cups her hands around her mouth* QUATRE!!! *she screams, but her scream is interrupted by a flash of lightning and the booming of thunder, pulls her coat closer to her body, shivers, continues running*  
Quatre: Sarafu?  
Sarafu: *tries again* QUBOOMRE!!!  
Quatre: Sarafu!  
Sarafu: *turns one way, sees nothing, her tears are blended in with the rain*  
Quatre: *begins walking*  
Sarafu: Where are you??? *bows head*  
~~~  
Trowa: *smiles*  
Fuujin: …  
Wufei: Earth to Fuujin! Hello? *waving his hand in front of her face*  
Fuujin: *bites his hand*  
Heero: *looks at them, raises eyebrow* I'm not involved...  
Wufei: *screams curse words*  
Heero: O.O  
~~~  
Quatre: SARAFU!!!  
Sarafu: Huh? Quatre? *looks up, sees a dark figure walking toward her*  
Quatre: *runs towards Sarafu*  
Sarafu: *watches him run toward her, smiling, her eyes filling with tears*  
Quatre: *hugs Sarafu, lifting her off the ground* I'm sorry. Please forgive me…  
Sarafu: *shocked, then sighs, placing her head on his shoulder* No, forgive me...it was my fault in the first place...  
Quatre: No, if I weren't such an asshole, then none of this would have happened…  
~~~  
Fuujin: *takes the bottle out and drinks the rest*  
Heero: O.O Alcohol...*sweatdrops, stares at bottle* O_O  
Fuujin: What, you want some?  
Heero: *silent, remembers what she did to Wufei, rapidly shakes head back and forth*  
Fuujin: *lies back on the counter*  
Wufei: *holding an ice pack on the bite wound*  
Heero: O_O  
Wufei: Dammit, onna, that hurt!  
Heero: O_O  
Fuujin: Quit whinin'!  
Wufei: I'm not!  
Duo: *snoring on couch, a pillow over his face*  
Trowa: *sweatdrop*  
Heero: O_O  
Fuujin: What?  
Heero: O_O *in a trance*  
~~~  
Sarafu: *smiles* Quatre...*frowns, looks away in shame* I'm sorry...for everything I've done to you...  
Quatre: *picks Sarafu up and begins carrying her home* Don't be…   
Sarafu: *smiles, places her arms around his neck, her head on his shoulder* Quatre...thank you...*closes her eyes, sighs* ...Thank you for everything...  
Quatre: *smiles*  
Sarafu: *looks up into his dark blue eyes, smiles back*  
Quatre: *kisses her*  
Sarafu: *shocked, but closes her eyes and kisses him back, pulls herself closer*  
~~~  
Trowa: *smiles* They did it...  
Duo: Huh? Wha? *rubs eyes*  
Trowa: *screams into kitchen* Hey! Quatre and Sarafu did it!   
Heero: O_O oooooooooooooooooo...  
Fuujin: Huh?  
Wufei: Good  
Fuujin: I need another beer.  
Wufei: No.  
Heero: O_O ...beer...gooooood....  
Duo: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ON MY NOSE?!?!?!  
Fuujin: Duo, they taped your nose, so you'd quit snoring.  
Duo: *pulls tape off nose* OW!!! DAMMIT!!! *tries to shake tape off hands, but it's stuck* DAMMIT!!! DAMN IT ALL!!! WHAT THE HELL'S GOIN ON, DAMMIT?!?!?!  
Fuujin: You okay?  
Duo: *sighs* Yeah, I'm fine...  
Fuujin: *takes the tape off of him*  
Duo: Thanks...  
Wufei: You bite me, and baby Duo?  
Duo: *smiles, trying not to laugh*  
Fuujin: *snaps at Wufei again*  
Wufei: Hey, watch it! Those hurt!  
Quatre: *walks into the house, carrying Sarafu*  
Sarafu: *giggles*   
Quatre: *smiles*  
Trowa: *looks at them* Hey, look who's home...  
Wufei: About time you got back…  
Heero: O_O Must...have...beer...goooooooood...  
Fuujin: *climbing the counter, then falls off the counter, landing with a loud thud on the floor* Hi…  
Heero: O_O ...Bud...weis…eeer....  
Fuujin: Bud....  
Duo: Weis...  
Heero: O_O Eeeeeeer....  
Trowa: *sweatdrop*  
Sarafu: *looks at Fuujin* Fuujin, you ok???  
Fuujin: Yeah…*turns to Duo* I love you, man.  
Sarafu: *covers her mouth, trying to stifle her giggling*  
Heero: O_O...  
Duo: *smiles* I know.  
Fuujin: Hey, Sarafu! You and Quatre should take a shower!  
Sarafu: O.O  
Quatre: O.O  
Trowa: O.O  
Duo: O.O  
Heero: O_O Eeeeeeer.....  
Fuujin: Can someone help me up?  
Wufei: No, you'll bite me again!  
Sarafu: O.O shower...  
Duo: O.O Bud...  
Trowa: O.O Weis...  
Heero: O_O Eeeeeeer....  
Sarafu: Shower???  
Quatre: O_O  
Sarafu: O_O  
Fuujin: Yes, shower…………Duo, help me up, please…  
Duo: *helps her up*  
Wufei: -_-'  
Fuujin: Thanks.  
Duo: No prob…*smiles*  
Wufei: Be careful, she bites, and it hurts! *shows Sarafu the bruise*  
Sarafu: O.O Oh my...  
Fuujin: Where's the beer?  
Heero: O_O Beer...  
Duo: *runs into garage, come back with a bunch of beer cans in his hands* THERE WE GO!!!  
Fuujin: *takes some and drinks like you wouldn't believe*  
Heero: O_O BEER!!! *lunges at it, grabs six cans, runs off to the bathroom, closes door*  
Quatre: Sarafu, I think it's best if we stay away from them.  
Sarafu: Yeah...*snuggles up against his chest, closing her eyes* I'd stay with you forever...  
Quatre: *blushes*  
Sarafu: *giggles*  
Quatre: *carries her to the "LOVE SEAT"*  
Sarafu: *smiles*  
Wufei: -_-'  
Duo: Slow down there, girl! *drinks just as fast as she does*  
Trowa: *sweatdrop*  
Fuujin: Race ya!  
Duo: *slurp* Hm? K!  
Fuujin: *drinking as fast as she can*  
Duo: *drinks 12 cans of beer in 30 seconds*  
Fuujin: *drinking the same pace as him*  
Wufei: -_-'  
Duo: *completely drunk, voice is slurred* Hey...that wash...fun...  
Fuujin: *nods*  
Naomi: *walks in soaked* TTTTTRRRRRRROOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *tackles Trowa*  
Trowa: OH SHIT!!! *is tackled*  
Duo: *looks at Wufei, puts an arm around his shoulders* I love you, man...*falls asleep on Wufei's shoulder, snoring and drooling*  
Wufei: *throws Duo across the room*  
Duo: *hits wall, still fast asleep, slides down wall, hits head with a thud, still asleep*  
Fuujin: Beer. B is for Beer…  
Heero: *burps in bathroom* Ahhhhhhhhhh...  
Sarafu: *smiles*   
Naomi: I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! *trying to kiss him*  
Trowa: NO, NO, NO!!! GET OFF ME, BITCH!!! *holds her back*  
Naomi: Never ever ever ever!!!  
Trowa: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Quatre: -_-' Welcome to the zoo…  
Sarafu: *runs her finger down his chest* Well, whatdya say we find some other place???   
Quatre: 0_0…umm, sure.  
Sarafu: *giggles, kissing him on the cheek*  
Quatre: *smiles*   
Sarafu: *puts her arms around his neck*  
Wufei: *tosses Naomi across the room*  
Trowa: *bows to Wufei* THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU...  
Fuujin: *naming letter, then naming an al-key-hall for that letter*  
Wufei: -_-'  
Quatre: *picks her up* Were to, milady?  
Sarafu: Hmmm...I'm not sure. You're the prince, you decide...*smiles*   
Quatre: I'm nothing but your humble loving slave.  
Sarafu: *giggles, runs a finger down his chest* Well...if you want, we could check out your room??? After all, I've never been there, and I'd like to know what it's like...   
Quatre: *smiles, takes her up the stairs*  
Sarafu: *giggles some more, kisses him on the cheek, smiles* Quatre...*rubs up against his chest like a baby, sighs*  
Quatre: Sarafu…I love you…  
Sarafu: *smiles* I love you, too...  
Quatre: *smiles and kisses her*  
Sarafu: *kisses him back passionately, wrapping her arms around his neck*  
Naomi: *gets up and tackles Wufei*  
Wufei: GET THE HELL OFF ME!!!!!!   
Fuujin: *crawls over to Duo* Yellow?  
Duo: *big YAAAAAAAWN, snooooooooore*  
Wufei: TROWA, GET HER OFF!  
Trowa: HELL NO!!! *runs off*  
Wufei: HEERO!!!!!!  
Heero: O_O Mmm...beer...*drinks another, eats the can*  
Fuujin: *tackles Naomi and beats the shit out of her, then passes out*  
Duo: *looks at Fuujin* Mommy??? *looks at Wufei* Daddy???  
Wufei: *puts Fuujin and Duo on the couch to sleep* Hell no!  
Duo: Daddy, down't say such bawd worwds...*falls asleep instantly*  
Fuujin: *mumbling*  
Wufei: I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING FATHER!  
Sarafu: *looks at Wufei* We should get going...they're really starting to scare me...  
Quatre: Yeah. *takes her to his room*  
Trowa: *peeks out from behind the couch, looks around*  
Duo: *snoooooooooooore*  
Wufei: It's safe.  
Trowa: *bows in front of Wufei* THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU…  
Wufei: Thank her. *points to Fuujin* You weakling, you wouldn't even help me!  
Trowa: *bows to Fuujin* THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU…  
Fuujin: *sits up* Huh?  
Trowa: *kissing her feet*  
Trowa: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU...  
Fuujin: *smiling* I'M THE QUEEN OF THE WORLD! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!  
Trowa: My Queen...I worship you and only you...for destroying the evil Demon Naomi...I shall worship you forever...  
Fuujin: *blushes*  
Wufei: Hey, that's my woman!  
Trowa: *turns to Wufei* You treat her poorly...I must protect my Queen from people such as yourself...  
Wufei: Oh no, you don't!  
Trowa: *flips over him* I'm over here! *waves*  
Wufei: Hey, you lil fag, stand still!   
Trowa: *flips over him again* No wait, I'm over here...*waves*  
Wufei: *tries to tackle Trowa*  
Trowa: *flips over him* Catch me if you ca-an!  
Wufei: *lands on the ground*  
Duo: *snuggles up against Fuujin* Mommy...  
Fuujin: *looks at Duo* Well, at least he isn't using my pillows… *cuddles up to Duo, because she's cold*  
Duo: *whimpers* Mommy???  
Fuujin: No.  
Wufei: Looks like we both lost… *points to them*  
Trowa: *taps Wufei* Catch me, Wu-wu! *flips again*  
Wufei: *tries to catch Trowa*  
Trowa: Hahaha!  
Wufei: HOLD STILL!!!!!!!!  
Trowa: MWAHAHA!!! NEVER!!! *flips again and again and again and again and again*  
~~~  
Heero: *throwing up in the bathroom*  
Dorothy: *her head looks up* Heero, my love, please help me...  
Heero: *looks at her, shakes head, flushes toilet*   
Dorothy: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! *spinning around, is sucked back down*  
Heero: That beer's really getting to my head...*shakes his head, continues throwing up*  
~~~  
Duo: *watches, getting dizzy, holds his head* I'm dishy, mommy...  
Fuujin: I'm not your mommy, and don't frab on me…Stop!  
Trowa: *obeys, stops, bows to her*  
Heero: *opens door, looks out, steps out*  
Fuujin: Yellow, Heero!  
Heero: *covers his mouth, his eyes go all funny, runs back in, slamming door, throws up*  
Fuujin: I LOVE YOU TOO!!!!!! *smiles and flirts with Trowa*  
Trowa: *straight face*   
Wufei: *growls*   
Trowa: *coughs, looks at Wufei*  
Wufei: *giving Trowa a death glance*  
Trowa: *ahem, looks around nervously*  
Fuujin: Huh? What? *looking at Trowa and Wufei*  
Trowa: *cringes*  
Wufei: *still glaring at Trowa*  
Trowa: *slowly shrinks, either that, or Wufei's head's getting bigger*  
Fuujin: *hugs Trowa's leg*  
Wufei: *takes out his katana*  
Trowa: *looks at her, glares, whispers harshly* Get off me! *glances back at Wufei, nervously*  
Fuujin: Why?  
Wufei: *walks closer to Trowa*  
Trowa: OH SHIT!!! *limps around house as fast as he can, dragging Fuujin along behind him*  
Wufei: *chasing them*  
Fuujin: Where're we going?  
Trowa: AWAY FROM HERE!!! *runs out door* Let go of my leg, please...*tries to shake her off*  
Fuujin: *holds on and wraps her legs around his, so there's no chance of her getting shaken off*  
Duo: *giggles like a little schoolgirl, points at them* Mommy and that funnyman are pwaying, daddy!  
Wufei: YES, AND I'M GOING TO KILL THE FUNNYMAN!!!  
Duo: *giggles* Youw funny, daddy!  
Wufei: *walking closer to them*  
Trowa: *shaking his leg frantically, sweating buckets* GET OFF!!!  
Fuujin: I love you, too!  
Wufei: *getting closer*  
Trowa: *almost in tears, whines* Please let go...I'll give you ANYTHING!!!  
Fuujin: *thinking* ANYTHING?  
Trowa: ANYTHING!!!  
Fuujin: *thinking, stands up and hugs Trowa*  
Duo: *jumps on Wufei's back, smiling widely* YAY!!! I want a piggyback ride, daddy!  
Wufei: GET OFF ME, YOU BAKA!!!  
Duo: *smiling, hugs Wufei's neck* YAY!!! LET'S PWAY, DADDY!!!  
Wufei: GET OFF, YOU RUNT!!!  
Duo: OINK, OINK!!! *sticks out is tongue*  
~~~  
Quatre: *smiling, enters room*  
Sarafu: *looks around* So, this is the great Quatre-sama's room???  
Quatre: I'm not great without you…  
Sarafu: *blushes, smiles* Quatre...you're so sweet...*kisses him*  
Quatre: *kisses her back passionately*  
Sarafu: *giggles as they enter his room, she kicks the door shut with her toes*  
~~~  
Wufei: *trying to get Duo off*  
Duo: *sits on his shoulders, with his legs around his neck* YAY!!! *waves in the air*  
Heero: *walks out, rubbing his stomach, sees Duo on Wufei, covers mouth, eyes go all funny, runs back in, slams door, throws up*  
Fuujin: I want…ummmmm…I want a…*thinking while hugging Trowa*  
Trowa: *looks like he has to go to the bathroom, jumping up and down* Ple-he-hease, hurry up!   
Fuujin: *lets Trowa go, and pouts, is giving him puppy eyes*  
Wufei: *still trying to get Duo off him*  
Duo: *cheering, waving hands in the air* YAY!! WHOOHOO!!!  
Wufei: GET OFF ME!!!  
Fuujin: *still pouting and sits on the floor*   
Wufei: *stops and glares at Trowa again, seeing Fuujin pouting*  
Trowa: Don't pout...  
Fuujin: *pouting* You hate me…*looks at the ground*  
Trowa: I don't hate you...  
Fuujin: Yes, you do…  
Trowa: No, I don't...*bends over to hold her, but sees Wufei, stands back up*   
Duo: YEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!  
Wufei: *sighs and smashes Duo*  
Duo: *on floor, eyes rolling around* Owie...  
Wufei: *mood swings*  
Fuujin: *looks at Duo and stumbles over to him*  
Duo: Mommy, you ok???  
Heero: *same routine*  
Fuujin: I'M NOT YOUR MOMMY!!!   
Duo: *cringes, hides* Never yell at Shinigami...*pouts*  
Fuujin: Sorry… * hugs him*  
Duo: *hugs her back* YAY!!!  
Fuujin: *smiles*  
Wufei: *glares in a jealous rage*  
Duo: *looks around* Has anyone seen Quatre and Sarafu???  
Trowa: Not since about an hour ago...  
Fuujin: Making lil Quatres and Sarafus…  
Trowa: O.O  
Duo: ?_?  
Wufei: I didn't want to know that…  
Duo: *turns to her* Mommy, where do babies come from????  
Fuujin: One, I'm not your mommy, and two, sex is where babies come from.  
Duo: O.O  
Trowa: *sweatdrop* Great explanation, Fuujin...  
Duo: EWWW!!! GROOOOOOOSSS!!!!!!!!!  
Wufei: I thought you and Hilde were pros at it???  
Duo: *cocks head to left* Who's Hilde??? *point to Wufei* Who are you??? *points to himself, turns to Fuujin* Who am I??? *tugs at Wufei's hand* Help me! Help me! I don't know where I live!  
Fuujin & Wufei: -_-'  
Duo: What are Aunt Sarafu and Uncle Quatre doing again??? *looks up at Fuujin*  
Fuujin: *sits on the floor* I told you! Making lil Quatres and Sarafus.  
Duo: You mean...*look of disgust on his face* EWWW!!! GROOOOOOOOSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!  
Fuujin: Are you sick?  
Heero: *same routine*  
Duo: *looks at Wufei and Fuujin* When am I gonna have little brothers and sisters??? *smiles*  
Fuujin & Wufei: 0_0  
Fuujin: I'm not your mommy!  
Trowa: Oh, sorry...*rubs eyes* Guess it was my turn to fall asleep...what's goin on???  
Wufei: Trowa, explain to him that we're not his parents.  
Trowa: They're not your parents! *slaps him* Snap out of it, man!  
Duo: Owie...*cries* WAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!*sniff*  
Fuujin: *looks at Trowa and sighs*   
Trowa: *sweatdrop* Oi...Duo's really lost it this time...  
Fuujin: *hugs Duo* Duo, honey, look at me.  
Duo: *crying*  
Fuujin: DDUUOO, look at me!  
Duo: *looks at her, stars in his eyes* Is that you, Bob...thank you...*hugs her* I've had a lovely evening...*falls on his face*  
Fuujin: I'm not Bob, either. *picks him up*  
Duo: *whimpers, sucks his thumb*  
Fuujin: *pulls his thumb out of his mouth*  
Duo: *pulls thumb away* Mine! *sucks on it again*  
Fuujin: *pulls it out again and sticks his thumb in her mouth*  
Wufei: -_-'  
Duo: EWWW!!! That's gross! But not as gross as...  
Trowa: Shove it, Duo!  
Duo: *shuts up*  
Fuujin: *bites his thumb, not hard* As what?  
Duo: *smiles* Not as gross as what… *Trowa covers his mouth*  
Trowa: That's enough out of you, young man!  
Fuujin: *kicks Trowa's shins* AS WHAT!?  
Duo: Like...*Trowa throws himself at Duo, tackling him*   
Trowa: STOP IT!!!  
Fuujin: Please. *kicks Trowa again*  
Trowa: Ow! Ow! Ow! *limps around room*  
Duo: *rubs head, looks at Fuujin* Huh???  
Fuujin: Like what??? *pulls Duo closer to her*  
Wufei: *glaring at them*  
Duo: Like what Aunt Sarafu and Uncle...*Heero comes out and tackles him*   
Heero: My monkey!!!  
Duo: AAAAHHHH!!!!  
Heero: *pins Duo under him* Have you seen my monkey??? *chews on Duo's braid*  
Duo: EWWW!!!!! *smacks him with his braid*  
Heero: Owie...*starts to cry, runs in bathroom, continues throwing up*  
Fuujin: MY DUO!!! *pulls Duo toward her, smiles* Like what?  
Duo: Like what Aunt...*looks at window, points* Hey, look! I see Santy Claus! *nothing is outside*  
Fuujin: LIKE WHAT!?!?!?  
Duo: Why do you wanna know??? Santy Claus brought me presents...I hope...  
Fuujin: Because if you don't tell me, I'll kiss you!  
Duo: *pulls away in disgust* EWWW, that's gross, mommy!  
Fuujin: THEN TELL ME!!!  
Duo: *whispers it in her ear* Like what Aunt Sarafu and Uncle Quatre are doing right now... *hint hint, wink wink, nudge nudge*  
Fuujin: Ta who?  
Duo: Huh???  
Wufei: ???  
Fuujin: *walks to the bathroom and pounds on the door*  
Heero: *throwing up* WHAT?!?!?! I want my monkey! *barf*  
Fuujin: *makes monkey noises*  
Heero: *runs out* My monkey??? *looks around*  
Wufei: *laughing*  
Fuujin: *walks in the bathroom, shuts the door*  
Heero: Dammit...*pounds on door* Let me in! I think I'm gonna...*holds mouth, eyes go all funny, starts to turn green*  
Fuujin: I gotta go potty!  
Trowa: *grabs a vase and lets Heero throw up in it*  
Fuujin: *flushes, washes her hands and walks out of the bathroom* All better! ^_^ *walks in the kitchen and climbs the counter and falls off again*  
Wufei: Onna?  
Duo: Mommy???  
Fuujin: …  
~~~  
Quatre: *smiles*  
Sarafu: *touches her forehead to his*  
Quatre: *kisses her*  
Sarafu: *pulls his head forward, kissing him deeper*  
Quatre: *sets her on the bed*  
Sarafu: *pulls him ontop of her*  
Quatre: 0_0  
Sarafu: *smiles, runs a finger down his chest*  
Quatre: *blushes*  
Sarafu: Well, Quatty??? *puts arms around him, pulls his body against hers*  
Quatre: *blushes extremely red and kisses her*  
Sarafu: *feels his warm body presses against hers, gets goosebumps all over*   
Quatre: You're so lovely…  
Sarafu: *strokes his face* Not as lovely as you, my prince...  
Quatre: *smiles*   
Sarafu: *smiles back*   
Quatre: *kisses Sarafu's neck*  
Sarafu: Oh Quatre... *giggles, runs her foot along his leg*  
Quatre: *continues to kiss her neck*  
Sarafu: *looks at Quatre's face, runs her hand down it, sees the bruise he'd gotten when Fuujin slapped him, gasps* How did that get there???  
Quatre: Ummm…I fell…  
Sarafu: *frowns* Awww, poor baby...*kisses the bruise gently*  
Quatre: *sighs in relief and smiles*  
Sarafu: *kisses him again*  
Quatre: *kisses back and has himself pressed against her*  
Sarafu: *sticks her hands up under his shirt*  
Quatre: 0_0 *takes his shirt off*  
Sarafu: *rubs his back, pulling him closer*  
Quatre: Mmm…  
Sarafu: *kisses him again*   
Quatre: *slides his arms around her, kissing back*  
Sarafu: *takes off her blouse so she's in her black tank top*  
Quatre: *staring at her*  
Sarafu: *takes his hands and slides them up her back, under her shirt*  
Quatre: 0_0 *smiles and blushes*  
Sarafu: *smiles passionately*  
Quatre: *frenches her*  
Sarafu: *moans, puts her arms around his neck*  
Quatre: *pulls her as close as he can*  
Sarafu: *runs her hands down his soft skin*  
Quatre: Mmm…  
Sarafu: *giggles, starts to undo his belt*  
Quatre: *smiles, blushes and kisses her again*  
Sarafu: *unbutton his pants, unzips the zipper*  
Quatre: *begins to undo her pants*  
Sarafu: *takes his hands and runs them up her back, under her shirt again*  
Quatre: *kisses her neck again*  
Sarafu: *groans, throwing her head back*  
Quatre: *continues to kiss her neck and downward*  
Sarafu: *kisses his forehead, reaches for his pants again*  
Quatre: *giving her a hickey*  
Sarafu: *gasps, groans*  
Quatre: *takes her shirt off and stares at her, then continues undoing her pants*  
Sarafu: *kisses him, sticking her hands down his pants*   
Quatre: 0_0  
Sarafu: *smiles* Damn... they don't call you "Master" Quatre for nothin'!   
Quatre: *blushes like mad*  
Sarafu: *pulls his pants down, so he's only in his boxers*   
Quatre: *takes her pants off*  
Sarafu: *giggles, touching her nose to his, kisses him*  
Quatre: *frenches her*  
Sarafu: *pulls the bed sheets over them both*  
Quatre: *smiles and kisses her all over*  
Sarafu: *giggles with pleasure*  
Quatre: *looks up at her and purrs*  
Sarafu: *smiles* You naughty boy...  
  
  
To Be Continued…^_^  
  
Author's Note: No, Sarafu and I do not own any of the GW characters. I own Fuujin, and Sarafu owns Sarafu (no duh!). Remember, this was made to make people laugh. If you are offended by any of this material, send your flames to chocoboviii@aol.com ! If you have any compliments, send them to chocoboviii@aol.com or fuujin_15@yahoo.com ! ^_^ Stay sweet, peoples!  



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